Ninty Decree Nisi

For years I have had an affection with the big Nin.

Sadly though she has become that bird who was a great shag when you were 20 and at 40 you realise you have just been with her for all of those years for something thats never going to be as good or in truth excite you again

I first got that feeling with the Wii(ank).

It was like the bird had been off and bought something nice and was for once making an effort

But after struggling with the poxy controller which only worked even half arsed well with Sports, I sort of knew the game was up.
But at least it still had backward compat with old Hamcube stuff which was refreshing.

Then we had the DS then NDS now 3DS. Its the same machine in all honesty, just like the Ninty games catalog which is on constant rehash. Yes some of those games are great but how many fuckin times do I have to be fed Mario or Zelda. Seriosly love, I dont think I can face your Spag Bol five times a week, to keep up the analogy.

Now we have the news that to fleece young kiddies again this Christmas, the N are re releasing a new Wii(ank) which has the added advantage of ........ drum roll......no backwards compat!. Yes they are re releasing their consoles now too but with less functionality.

Which all leads me to believe that the new (cough not new really just the same 5 years behind shite they have been plopping out since 2005) Wii(ank) U(off) will probably be looking to do away with backward compat too. Why...well because I think they now realise that if they are only actually making the same 5 games for each console, that eventually folks might not see a reason to keep duplicating their purchases.

So Big N, its been fun, well it used to be, but now you are sad tired and in truth rather ugly, and now that we are parting I can tell you that I never really liked that annoying tune you insisted on playing to me everytime I had any of your devices on. Most folks would have at least allowed me to mute you, but not you.
So take your hands out of my wallet, pack your bags and dont come back.

But if you do have any decent younger friends who are not just churning out the same shite year after year then do please give them my number.

Remember we will always have Zelda to remind us of the good old days. But lets face it....Link is now so old he is down the post office getting his pension.

I agree mate.
The peak was Ocarina of time, mario 64 then Metroid prime and wind waker on the cube. I lost interest after that to be honest. I still don't see what was so great about mario galaxy.

I enjoyed mario galaxy but it made me get the worse motion sickness ever!

What is the new wii then??

I agree about the handhelds though and even I have held off buying the 3DizzyS

Can't wait to see the Wii U though as I am hoping for friends list, cross game chat and achieves!

your post CRACKED me up though, love it.

REP

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There is the item matey

An excellent musing Everton!!!

I'm not sure i'm ready to admit it's over yet, though I fear you may be right!!

Maybe i'll keep trying a bit longer. Maybe arrange a "date" night once a week with the old girl, or buy some sexy lingerie and toys to spice up the relationship. Maybe go to marriage guidance.

Maybe you need to put abit more effort in yourself, think about snooker to try and last longer.

Also I recommend ribbed- for her pleasure

KENT HAMMER wrote:Maybe you need to put abit more effort in yourself, think about snooker to try and last longer.

Also I recommend ribbed- for her pleasure

I was carrying on the analogy Kent!! Not talking about the Mrs really!!! I can't get that close to HER!!