Halo Reach Legendary Code Giveaway

I have one spare card from the Halo Legendary Box to give away. This card has a code to grant you:

Spartan Armour Effect - Flaming Helmet (Ghost Rider style!)
Elite Armour for Multiplayer - I believe this is Officer armour, the highest for the Elites.
Falcon Avatar Accessory
Behind the Scenes Making of Video

And to win the code, all you have to do is tell me a joke. Halo related or otherwise, joke the makes me laugh the most wins.

We'll run this until Midday (UK) on Monday, good luck

old one but a good one i think:

A burglar breaks into a house. He sees a CD player that he wants so he takes it. Then he hears a voice "JESUS is watching you". He looks around with his flashlight wandering "What The HELL Was That?". He spots some $ on a table and takes it......Once again he hears a voice " JESUS is watching you". He hides in a corner trying to find where the voice came from. He spots a birdcage with a parrot in it! He goes over and asks " Was that your voice?". It said "YES". He then says "What's your name?". It says "MOSES". The burglar says " What kind of person names his bird moses??" The parrot replys "THE SAME PERSON THAT NAMES HIS ROTWEILER "JESUS".

There are only two problems with me entering this competition-
1. I do not own a copy of Halo Reach
and
2. I do not own a copy of Halo Reach

But it is such a big problem I mentioned it twice!

2 Firends are in a hot air balloon, when they rise above the clouds and get lost....
First guy: "where the hell are we?"

the second guy sticks his hand into the clouds and says "were in paris!!"

First guy: "how do you know?"
Second guy: "i just felt the Ifle Tower!"

they continue along and after a while again the firsts guy asks "where are we"
the second guy sticks his hand into the clouds and says "were in london!"

Fisrt guy: "how can you tell"
Second guy: "i just felt the top of big ben!"

After another long period the firsts guy asks "where are we now"

again the second guy sticks his hand into the clouds.

Second guy: "we must be in Liverpool!"
First guy: " but how do you know"

Second guy: "My watch is gone!"

All across the kingdom, the news travelled quickly that the Queen’s bell-ringer, who faithfully served the royal family for decades, had passed. The Queen made the royal decree that she was looking for someone to come and take his place.

The next day, a humble peasant was first in the long line of applicants for the job. “My Queen,” he entreated her, “since I was a youth, I have always wanted to serve our kingdom and the royal family in this way. Let me be your bell-ringer, and I will serve in earnest all the days of my life.”

The Queen appreciated the peasant’s words, but was puzzled. “My humble servant, I have but one question: how can you serve the kingdom as the royal bell-ringer? You don’t have any arms!”

The peasant smiled and said simply, “Take me to the tower and I will show you.”

The Queen, her entourage, and the peasant climbed the steps of the bell tower until they reached the top. The peasant looked over his shoulder at the queen, “Behold!” And with that, the peasant ran to the far side of the room, spun around and ran directly at the bell. Faster and faster he ran then leapt, flew through the air, and–WHAM!–hit the bell full-force with his face.

Stunned, the Queen hesitated. But, when she heard the bell peal as never before, she told the peasant, “the position is yours.”

Weeks went by as the peasant served faithfully and punctually, and always in the same way: he would run across the room, spin around, charge directly at the bell, leap, and–WHAM!–hit the bell full-force with his face.

Until, that is, one fateful morning when the peasant woke up late. Certain he could still make it in time, he ran from his common home, tore across the kingdom, scrambled up the tower, across the room, spun, leapt and…missed the bell entirely! He instead flew across the room, out the nearby window and plummeted a thousand feet to his death.

Having heard the commotion, the castle guards ran upstairs to find the empty room. They looked out the window to find a crowd gathering around the peasant’s body. The one guard looks at each other and says, “My God–that poor man! Have you any idea who he is?”

The other:

“I don’t know, but his face rings a bell!

Bob invents a type of fruit that tastes of strawberry on one side and banana on the other. He patents it, sells it and goes on to makes millions.

One day he's sitting on his private jet when his friend says to him "The strawberry/banana fruit was genius, but can you do it with anything else?" "Like what?" says Bob. "I want a fruit that tastes like pussy!" says the friend. "I'll see what I can do." replies Bob.

Bob goes back to the lab and after a couple of years of testing, presents the finished product to his friend. "Urghh, that tastes like shit!" says the friend disgusted. "I know." says Bob "Try the other side!"

Two young boys walked into a pharmacy one day......picked out a box of tampons and proceeded to the checkout counter.
The man at the counter asked the older boy, "Son, how old are you?"
"Eight," the boy replied.
The man continued, "Do you know what these are used for?"
The boy replied, "not exactly....... but they aren't for me....they're for him.
He's my brother..... He's four..... We saw on TV ,that if you use these ,you would be able to swim and ride a bike.
Right now, he can't do either."

Edit: Rep given also, it's good to see new members getting into the GSA spirit

I know I've told this one on here before but it's still one of my fave jokes and about the only one I can say with out messing up frequently lol
----------------------------
One morning and husband goes down stairs and grabs his wifes arse and comments "If this was a bit smaller you could ditch the pants."

The wife thought ok, I'll let that one slip.

The following morning he comes down this time grabbing her boobs and saying "If these were a bit firmer you could ditch the bra too"

This time she'd had enough of his comments and turned round.

Grabbing his crotch she retorted "Well dear if this was a bit bigger we could get rid of the postman, the gardener, the pool man and your brother"

Right, we'll call that Competition Closed.

Am gonna have a read through them and pick us a winner, so I'll get back to you all

Thanks for the entries peeps.

Right, I'm gonna go with lucious loopy, definitely a very good joke

All of them were good, I almost gave it to rainjermaine for his scouser joke, just for pulling a Liverpool joke on a thread hosted by a Liverpool lad

But yeah, the prize goes to loopy, I'll add you up on Live later on and send you the code in a message. Congrats

Look out for more competitions soon

Sweenaldo1985 wrote:Right, I'm gonna go with lucious loopy, definitely a very good joke

All of them were good, I almost gave it to rainjermaine for his scouser joke, just for pulling a Liverpool joke on a thread hosted by a Liverpool lad

But yeah, the prize goes to loopy, I'll add you up on Live later on and send you the code in a message. Congrats

Look out for more competitions soon

yay, thanks mate - rep given for such a top comp

Youre welcome. And thanks for the rep, I'll send you the code today

Thanks for PM'ing me the code, it worked a treat, extra rep for that